Letter from Mrs. Martin CF 89
To Mrs Guerin
Mars 1873.
Since I wrote to you, I had many troubles, my little girl was getting worse and worse. Last Monday, I sent for another doctor, M. Belloc. He came around five o'clock in the evening. After examining the child, he asked me what I was giving him. I told him what I had done; he found that it was good, but insufficient to nourish her in the state of weakness in which she was reduced.
He thinks you can feed a child without milk for two or three days, but no longer. Finally, he said to me: "This child needs the breast right away, that's the only thing that can save her." »
I didn't know what to do, because I couldn't think of feeding her myself and I had no nurse in sight. I explained my embarrassment to him, so he gave me a prescription: twice a day, I had to give him a spoonful of rice water with one of lime water, in two spoonfuls of milk.
When I saw this prescription, I said to myself: “My little girl is lost, she won't be able to bear two thirds of milk in the state she is in. Mrs. Leriche (niece by marriage of Mr. Martin) came to see her that evening, she was so struck by it that she went to bed without supper and did nothing but cry. She looked at her child and said: “If he was in this state, I would die! »
Finally, in the evening, I was looking for a way to get myself a nurse at all costs when I remembered a woman (Rose Taillé, to whom the two little Josephs had already been entrusted) whom I knew particularly well and who suited me in every way. reports. But her child is just a year older than mine, I thought the milk was too old.
It was seven o'clock, I go to the doctor; I tell him about my one-year-old nanny. He thought a bit and said to me: "You have to take it right away, it's the only resource now to save your child, and if that doesn't save her, at least you won't have anything to reproach yourself for." »
If it hadn't been so late, I would have gone straight away to fetch the nanny. The night seemed long to me. Therese hardly wanted to drink; all the most serious clues, which preceded the death of my other little angels, appeared and I was very sad, convinced that the poor darling could no longer receive any help from me, in the state of exhaustion in which she stood.
So I left at daybreak for the nurse who lives at Semallé, located nearly two leagues from Alencon. My husband was absent and I didn't want to tell anyone about the success of my approach. I met two men on a deserted road who inspired a certain fear in me, but I said to myself: “Even if they killed me, that wouldn't matter to me. I had death in my soul.
Finally, I arrived at the nanny's and asked her if she wanted to come with me to live with us altogether. She told me she couldn't leave her children and her house, that she would stay for eight days, then take the little one. I agreed, knowing that my child would be fine with her.
After half an hour, we both left together; we arrived at ten-thirty. The maid tells us: “I couldn't get her to drink, she doesn't want to take anything. The nurse looked at the child, shaking her head, with an air which seemed to say: "I ran a pointless errand!" »
I quickly went up to my room, knelt down at the feet of Saint Joseph and asked him in favor that the little one heal, while resigning myself to the will of the good God, if he wanted to take her with him. I don't cry often, but my tears flowed as I said this prayer.
I didn't know if I should go down... well, I made up my mind. And what do I see? The child who nursed with all his heart. She didn't let go until about one o'clock in the afternoon; she spurted a few mouthfuls and fell as dead on her nurse.
We were five around her. All were seized; there was a worker who was crying, I felt my blood freezing. The little one had no apparent breath. No matter how much you leaned over to try to find a sign of life, you couldn't see anything, but she was so calm, so peaceful, that I thanked God for having made her die so gently.
Finally, a quarter of an hour passes, my little Thérèse opens her eyes and begins to smile. From that moment, she was completely cured, the good looks returned as well as the cheerfulness; Since then, everything has been going well.
But my poor little one is gone. It's very sad to have raised a child for two months and then be obliged to entrust her to strange hands. What consoles me is knowing that the good Lord wants it so, since I did everything I could to bring him up myself; I therefore have nothing to reproach myself for in this respect.
I would have preferred to keep the nanny at home and my husband too; he didn't want the others, but he accepted this one, whom he knows to be an excellent woman.
I wish you with all my heart never to have children in this state, we don't know what to do, we fear not giving them what is appropriate, it is a continual anguish. You have to go through that to know what this torment is, I don't know if Purgatory is worse than that; we suffer there, it's true, but at least we know how to do it. Finally, here is yet another hard test.
