6th January 1889
JMJT
Dear little lamb of Jesus, Thank you!... If you only knew how happy your little word makes me!...
Ask Jesus for me to be very generous during my retirement, he is SCREAMING me with pinpricks, the poor little ball can't take it anymore, all over it has tiny holes that make it suffer more than if it didn't. had only one big one!... Nothing compared to Jesus, dryness!... Sleep!... But at least it's silence!... silence is good for the soul... But the creatures, oh! creatures!... The little ball quivers!... Understand Jesus' toy!... so sweet!... But the creatures!... Those around me are very good, but there is something I don't know what repels me!... I can't give you an explanation, understand your little soul . I am however VERY happy, happy to suffer what Jesus wants me to suffer, if he does not prick his little ball directly, it is he who leads the hand that pricks it!... Since Jesus wants to sleep, why would I stop? I am only too happy that he is not embarrassed with me, he shows me that I am not a stranger by treating me like this, because I assure you that he does not charge any expense to keep me in conversation!...
If you knew how much I want to be indifferent to the things of the earth, what do I care about all the beauties created, I would be unhappy in possessing them, my heart would be so empty!... It is incredible how big my heart seems to me when I consider all the treasures of the earth, since I see that all of them together could not satisfy him, but when I consider Jesus, how small he seems to me!... I would like to love him so much!... To love him more than 'He was never loved!... My only desire is to always do the will of Jesus! to wipe away the little tears that sinners cause him to shed... Oh! I don't WANT Jesus to have any pain on the day of my engagement, I would like to convert all the sinners on earth and save all the souls in purgatory!...
The Lamb of Jesus will laugh seeing this desire for the little grain of sand!... I know it's madness but yet I would like it to be so so that Jesus does not have a single tear to shed .
Pray that the grain of sand becomes an ATOM sensitive only to the eyes of Jesus!...
Therese of the Child Jesus post.carm.ind.
