the Carmel
From Mrs. Martin to her brother Isidore Guérin CF 13 – 23 April 1865

GUERIN Zélie, Mrs. Louis Martin
GUERIN Isidore


Letter from Mrs. Martin to her brother Isidore CF 13
April 23th
Hastily, I write you two words, because I am unable to write a long letter, I have a violent headache and am the target of incessant harassment. Also, we have my father-in-law who is almost dying, I don't think he will be alive in a fortnight; he dies of old age. he already has half of his body paralyzed (Captain Pierre-François Martin was then in his eighty-ninth year).
We received your letter, I don't remember everything in it. I know that you passed your exams, that you received the money we sent you, that the uncle and the aunt are well, that my father has to go to Paris, which he won't do. He had a swollen leg last week and was unable to go out for several days; he is better now, but the limb is still stiff, I still fear a paralysis attack. He saw the doctor who told him to go on a diet, which he doesn't want to do because he has a good appetite. He had at home, for a few days, his nephew, the son of G. Guérin. It's a small "tripotot", which looks more like a housekeeper than a student...
Little Léonie is doing well now, as are the three others. I went to see, a fortnight ago, the one who is in nursing; I don't remember ever having felt such a thrill of happiness as when I took her in my arms and she smiled at me so graciously that I thought I saw an angel; finally, it is inexpressible for me; I believe that we have not yet seen and that we will never see such a charming little girl. My little Hélène, when will I have the happiness of possessing her entirely? I cannot imagine that I have the honor of being the mother of such a delicious creature!... Oh! go, I do not repent of having married. If you had seen the two eldest today, how well groomed they were, everyone admired them and you couldn't take your eyes off of them. And me, I was there radiant, I said to myself: “It's mine! I still have two others who aren't there, a beautiful one and a less beautiful one that I like as much as the others, but it won't do me so much honor. »
Let's talk about other more serious things. You know that as a young girl, I kicked myself in the chest, at the corner of a table. No one paid attention to it then, but today I have a gland in my breast which is causing me concern, especially since it is causing me a little pain. However, when I touch it, it does me no harm, although I feel numbness every day and several times a day, well, I can't really say what, but what is certain , is that she makes me suffer.
What to do with that? I'm quite embarrassed. I wouldn't back down from an operation, no, I'm quite ready for it, but I only have half confidence in the doctors here. I would like to take advantage of your stay in Paris, because you would help me a lot in this circumstance. There's only one thing holding me back, how will my husband do during this time? I don't know, so please tell me as soon as possible what you think about it.
Louis makes many friends with you and since you don't want to continue your studies for a doctorate, he wants you to have a pharmacy like that of MR (Vital Romet), that very one, if that were possible. Nothing else to teach you, but that's already enough, I who intended to write you only two lines.

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